Being Agnostic

  1. a person who believes that nothing is known or can be known of the existence or nature of God or of anything beyond material phenomena; a person who claims neither faith nor disbelief in God.

There are (in general) three kinds of people – The ‘I know’ or the believers, the ‘I don’t care’ or non-believers and then the ‘I don’t know’ or agnostics.

One of the self-realizations I had at a very young age was that I was an “I don’t know” person when it came to the talk of ‘the higher power’. No rituals at home induced any feeling in me. I was neutral and sometimes even rebellious in these scenarios. I found my very private spot and a much more private relationship. A relationship I didn’t want to share with anyone. Rituals that involved none except myself.

A extreme level of trust. An understanding:

“I won’t ask anything from you so don’t expect anything from me. Just be there when I want to lean on you.”

I isolated myself from any religious rituals around me to gain this trust. To prove that if the higher power exists, it does not expect anything from me (nor do I). I do not have to please it nor do I have to question its existence. It will always be there for me when I need it. It had no shape or form (or it could be found in any shape or form I wanted it to appear in). That was my spot. A place where both of us are in an ideal relationship.

The last few days made me revisit my relationship and my spot. Like many other moments, as people were sharing their religious rituals on social media, on how they decorated an idol or what they did to please it, it made me wonder. I do nothing. I have no representation of my faith in my life. I am oblivious to any significant days where auspicious rituals are performed. I wanted to revisit and see if I want to change anything about it in my life. My relationship remains the same and has only grown stronger over the years but I realized I was ready for a visual representation. I wouldn’t mind an idol in my house that would represent the millions of other ways it is represented. And that is a big step (change) in my world.

Do you relate to this topic? What is your spot and your relationship? Do leave a comment if you stop by.

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14 thoughts on “Being Agnostic

  1. […] think I made it clear about my feelings towards rituals in my life in this post.  Having said that, I have also started realizing things I relate closely to. That is part of my […]


  2. I think we all are on a spiritual journey of some sort, Jan, and consequently always evolving. I come from a very religious Catholic family, and as a young girl had a personal experience that made me spend many years giving my services to the Church. In the last ten years or so, I’ve moved away from formal religion, but my faith in a God who loves and cares for us is stronger than before.

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  3. Hi, Jan! I’m an agnostic and former Christian seeking a type of spirituality that satisfies both my intellect and my need for connection. I still miss that about the Christian faith – not to the church, but to the supernatural. It was intimate and sweet. Nice to have found you.


  4. I do relate to this in many ways. I believe in the power. For me, it’s bhagwan – cos I am a Hindi speaking woman. This bhagwan hasn’t got a name. I have idols at home but I don’t follow any rituals, I do not have any thing that I don’t do on a certain day or similar things. I bow before the power – of whatever religion the power is.
    A good post, that made me think.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I was an athiest for a lonnnng time, and then softened into agnostic as I got older. Now I am somewhere between agnostic and believer, after returning to attending regular church services a few months ago. I don’t know if I really feel anything profound during services, but there are sparks of inspiration here and there that prompt me to examine life from a different angle. I think like all other things, we grow and evolve in our spiritual life. If you feel moved to have an idol, that’s a step in a new direction for you and it might lead you down an interesting path. 😉

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  6. I am an agnostic myself, but more so because I’m unable to take a proper decision or take sides. I definitely don’t believe in religion or rituals, but God is a question I wish to not answer. I don’t pray either, because I honestly never found the difference, or perhaps…the need? People say I’m more like an atheist, but then I do have faith. A thought provoking piece, it was nice to read about agnosticism, something I can relate to.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. It really is upto you how you want to believe or not believe in God. Since we have 33 crore Gods in Hinduism, I am sure we can please atleast one of them by doing nothing. I do believe in a higher being but like you, I am not into rituals or going to temples. My God is in my heart and he will listen when I want to talk to him.


  8. Interesting post. Is it faith you are looking for or just an idol that you can display? I used to wonder how people cannot have faith in God, where do they turn in adversity? Now that I’m more atheist in my way of thinking I wonder why they continue to turn to a God when usually the reason they are turning to God is because of an adversity in their lives placed there by God. But having been raised Catholic I do still love the Catholic Church and it’s rituals and idols. It’s a difficult question. I hope you find your answer.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks A! It is just an idol that will represent my culture and roots . I hear you..being raised a Hindu I love the temples, the colors and the food. Thank you for stopping by!


  9. Nice post — and great image to tie it altogether!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. As a believer growing up in the 21st century, I am intrigued by agnosticism. I think many believers have agnostic moments. It’s probably the position that makes the most sense in our society and is the most open in ways, because you haven’t decided. The other two do require a decision and it must be continuously made, if you want to remain sincere. It’s not easy either way living in today’s world. But faith requires a leap and even if I don’t get a nod of agreement from others, it’s okay, my faith is the core of my being. Without it, I would not be who I am.

    Liked by 1 person

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