“Jan, I think you put me on a pedestal” said R during the early stages of our relationship. It was a moment where I was struggling to voice a disagreement between us. I was not angry but disappointed and couldn’t come to terms with the fact that he had said something wrong. Mulling over it for over a week, self doubting myself I finally decided to tell him I disagree with his opinion. But I struggled, choked and teared up.